When I am having a hard time, I remember you; how great would it be if you were here.
When I feel happy, I remember you; how wonderful would it be if you were beside me.
The time is moving so slow but so fast without you. Not a single day has passed that I’m not missing you!
I try to cry it all out but no matter how many wells I cry, it doesn’t seem to go away.
I’m so afraid. What should I do?
Every night and day I pray that someday soon I’ll see you again and tell you about everything that happened since you left. Everything you missed, everything you didn’t see, I’ll tell you everything and I wouldn’t ever get tired of talking and narrating every single thing. I miss you.
I’m doing well now, I am not afraid of crossing the roads alone, I’ve been doing fine without supervision, and I’ve been very strong now. I have learned my lesson now, can you come back now?
You have no idea how you changed my life. The 17-year-old became 30 in an instant. I became so good at managing heartbreaking things! I developed this talent in hiding which I am now very good at it. I knew how to stop drops from falling down, I knew how to shut up when it’s about to scream out loud, I learned how to smile even when my soul is barely breathing.
I learned how to think of others, and now it has been very addictive that I only think about others.
I easily cry in front of strangers but tears don’t seem to roll down my cheeks when in front of our loved ones.
I immediately cry in little things but remain smiling when I’m about to lose myself…
I’m so stupid, thinking that you’ll come back if I do all of these…
It’s been really really hard. And I’m sorry you had to see me in my most miserable and disappointing moments. I may be able to hide it from the people here but definitely not from you. Even when I miss you and sometimes hate you for leaving me, I clearly know you didn’t want to leave me behind. I know how much you want to give me a big & tight hug, I know you feel miserably crazy for not being here with me.
It’s just that I crazy miss you.
Even when I can’t see you, even when I can’t hold you, even when I can’t hear you, I know you are always beside me. Laughing with me and crying with me.
I miss you.
I crazy miss you and I pray I could kiss you and wish you a Happy Birthday today.
Happy 28th, my dearest Pingkai! I miss you dearly.
Do not ever worry about me. I am doing well, I could be overdramatic sometimes but I’ll definitely be fine..
To others, you may be gone; but for me, you are well alive in my heart. In times when I feel down and feel like the world is against me, I remember that a beautiful, loving and sweet sister is up there cheering for me. Thank you for protecting me from disappearing! Do not ever be burdened by me because I’ve grown alot and now can handle things. Do not ever hate yourself for not being able to stay. I may rant sometimes like earlier but I totally understand everything. I just turn stupid sometimes because I miss you. Don’t ever worry, God has blessed me with genuine and wonderful people. They are really great that I don’t really mind not getting married anymore. But if you really feel bad, do me a favor. Appear in Yook Sung Jae’s dream and tell him to find and marry me. KIDDING! ( don’t worry, I’m not insane)
You will forever be my one and only sister whom I’ll love and miss forever.
Happy Birthday to you Love!